It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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