If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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