Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
