i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
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he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
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We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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