mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
