You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
