maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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