is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
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I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
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There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You are a genius and a whore.
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