I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
