This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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