What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize