Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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