I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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