Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(956): View more from Texas

is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?

(210): View more from Texas

no

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(956): is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge? (210): no http://tfl.nu/pkgs

Replies (15) Good night (1971) Bad night (5029)
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(434): View more from Virginia

Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.

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(434): Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying. http://tfl.nu/4yli

Replies (3) Good night (2168) Bad night (824)
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(805): View more from California

The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.

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(805): The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery. http://tfl.nu/hbuh

Replies (7) Good night (1321) Bad night (4394)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?

(304): View more from West Virginia

No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.

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(304): I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us. (1-304): Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat? (304): No there was a goat. I gave it a donut. http://tfl.nu/bds8

Replies (15) Good night (6530) Bad night (1006)
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(330): View more from Ohio

Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.

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(330): Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette. http://tfl.nu/sax7

Replies (7) Good night (693) Bad night (2460)
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(585): View more from New York

The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.

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(585): The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many. http://tfl.nu/e659

Replies (6) Good night (1220) Bad night (470)
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(541): View more from Oregon

So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"

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(541): So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that" http://tfl.nu/ex2y

Replies (12) Good night (2500) Bad night (887)
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(831): View more from California

After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"

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(831): After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!" http://tfl.nu/os8d

Replies (4) Good night (2688) Bad night (569)
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(607): View more from New York

Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.

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(607): Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun. http://tfl.nu/atlx

Replies (6) Good night (559) Bad night (1849)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.

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(405): Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out. http://tfl.nu/dhlk

Replies (9) Good night (1705) Bad night (412)
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(317): View more from Indiana

I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.

(1-317): View more from Indiana

As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.

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(317): I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing. (1-317): As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you. http://tfl.nu/0owh

Replies (5) Good night (1393) Bad night (438)
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(513): View more from Ohio

He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk

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(513): He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk http://tfl.nu/w9ix

Replies (2) Good night (490) Bad night (309)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.

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(828): He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something. http://tfl.nu/ank0

Replies (4) Good night (633) Bad night (427)
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(253): View more from Washington

We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.

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(253): We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken. http://tfl.nu/e42q

Replies (4) Good night (741) Bad night (260)
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(815): View more from Illinois

I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.

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(815): I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds. http://tfl.nu/48of

Replies (1) Good night (257) Bad night (347)

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