Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
