okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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