at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
