I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
