O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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