Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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