i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
