in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
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You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
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Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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