**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
50% drunk capacity currently
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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