I don't usually arrange sex via text message
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize