Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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