last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Randomize
