Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
