I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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