You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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