none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize