We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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