It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize