I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
