i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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