I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
