I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
YAS. BRING CRAB.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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