Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
