don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
