You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
