no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize