I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
