STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.