I accidentally had phone sex last night
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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