I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I wish i was in the wii world.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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