32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
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i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
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Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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