ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
