Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
