Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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