he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
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