I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
